Dear UT Students and People Who Dress Like UT Students,
In the past few weeks, the weather in sunny central Texas has taken an unpleasant turn towards cold and dank. In light of these chilly conditions, it has come to my attention that many central Texans, especially those walking on the UT campus or, worse, leaving UT campus to venture into more public arenas, must not know how to dress for temperatures that cause chill bumps to rise on one's skin. Evidence of this is prevalent anywhere girls between the ages of 16-22 can be found.
In light of this dilema, I have provided examples of several absurd outfits that have recently paraded about Austin, posing as acceptable winter clothing. I wish to inform the wearers, that not only are these outfits inadequate for cold weather, (and yes, I've lived in the great frozen north, I know how to bundle up), but they look plain silly. Or, perhaps I am just behind on my fashion, or worse, am overlooking the practicalities of these ensembles; if this is the case, please explain them to me via email or comment.
The "running shorts over leggings or tights with athletic shoes and a hoodie" creation. It seems counter-intuitive (at least to me) to pair two non-winter items, thinking they will combine into a winter-worthy piece. Remember the adage: two wrongs don't make a right? That applies here. PS - hoodies are not coats.
ridiculous winter outfit #2
The classic "my butt is burning but my feet are feezing" mini-skirt + Ugg boot combination. While I appreciate the symmetry of applying faux fur to both the lower and top halves of one's body, I still can not fathom how a mini skirt creates enough warmth to keep one's cheeks sufficiently cozy. Worse, the last time I saw this outfit in action was Tuesday, on a high school campus, on a teenage mother who had just had baby #2. Let's not even start to talk about the power of suggestion.
ridiculous winter outfit #3
Finally, there is the "Ugg-boots-tucked-over-sweat-pants-with-a-preppie-coat" concotion. Seriously? You have enough sense to wear a nice coat but wear it over baggy house pants tucked geekily into boots? I must be getting old, because this outfit makes me giggle.
Since the theme of the above ensembles seems to be comfort, (perhaps with the exception of outfit #2), I offer the following, simple, basic, classic elements of winter weather wear. These require no thought between bed and class, but at least make one look presentable enough so as not to appear like the bottom of a hamper was the origins of the outfit.
not ridiculous winter clothes
Blue jeans, a bag actually worthy of carrying books, a warm coat, cardigans acceptable for public appearances, and if you must - an Ugg shoe I actually don't hate - faux fur and all.
And if you protest that no one judges their classmates on a college campus, I have to confess, finally - I laughed at all the girls who wore PJ pants and equally ridiculous, sloppy items to class all through my university studies, and I wasn't the only one.